My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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