remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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