I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize
