Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
