Taylor Swift is so right about you.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
