Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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