youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize