I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
where are you?
Hypothermia
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
