we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Randomize
