oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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