I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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