Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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