I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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