I wish you could order shots online.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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