But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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