So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
