I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
