Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Randomize
