I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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