STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
