Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Randomize
