Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
