Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
