Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
