my vag is so smooth its legendary
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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