so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
