Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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