Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
