More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize