they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
