And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
