We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Randomize
