She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
