But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
