do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
