I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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