Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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