Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
