ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
