i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
