So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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