Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
