Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
