their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
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At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
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I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
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