Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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