You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
