We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
