There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I know her cup size but not her name....
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