so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
