I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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