I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
So vagazzling was a success
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