The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
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